# Bless the South



## Terry Devine (Mar 11, 2008)

BLESS _the_ SOUTH!!!!!

*Tennessee* 
The owner of a golf course was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He called her into his office and said, "You graduated from the University of Tennessee and I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?" The secretary thought a moment, and then replied, "Everything but my earrings." 

*Alabama* 
A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in two's for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under the weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's Henry?" The others asked. "Henry had a stroke of some kind; he's a couple of miles back up the trail," the successful hunter replied. "You left Henry laying out there and carried the deer back?" They inquired. "A tough call,"nodded the hunter, "But I figured no one is going to steal Henry!"  

*Texas*  
*The sheriff pulled up next to the guy unloading garbage out of his pick-up into the ditch. The sheriff asked, "Why are you dumping garbage in the ditch? Don't you see that sign right over your head." "Yep,” he replied, "That's why I'm dumpin it here; cause it says 'Fine for Dumping Garbage.'"**
**Louisiana* 
A senior at LSU was overheard saying, "When the end of the world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana ." When asked why, he replied, "I'd rather be in Louisiana because everything happens in Louisiana 20 years later than in the rest of the civilized world."  

*Mississippi* 
The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said to his buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking lot!" 
Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was?" The young man answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got his license number." 

*Georgia* 
A Georgia State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-75. The trooper asked, "Got any I.D.?" 
The driver replied, "Bout whut?" 

*North Carolina*  
A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait. A passerby studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around and went back. He asked the fellow what the problem was. The man replied, "I have a flat tire." The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?" The man responded, "When you break down, they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the back; hey, it don't make no sense to me neither." 

*And this from South Carolina*
*You can say what you want about the South, but I ain't never heard of anyone wanting to retire to the North!* *
* 
*AMEN!*


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## Harry Keely (Aug 26, 2009)

YOU FORGOT THE FLORIDA, its doesn't get more south than that?????????????????:roll:


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## Harry Keely (Aug 26, 2009)

Would live in NYC, LINY or Florida in a heart beat than any other state you mentioned above and hope to retire if not move or get relocated real soon to one of the three I mentioned. JMO:twisted:


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## Ben Colbert (Mar 9, 2010)

Forgot Virginia!

May not bethe deep south butit was the home of Robert E. Lee and Stonewall Jackson, the seat of the confederacy and if you still aren't convinced then you are invited to one of my Granddad's Sunday fish fry...cornbread, collard greens, barbecue, sweet tea, pie...I wish I was there now.


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

Hey I"m from the south....west  When I retire, it's going to be out there in the desert, where it's warm and my arthritic old ass can move around all year long


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## Adam Swilling (Feb 12, 2009)

Florida is only part of the south geographically. More northern or western transplants there than there are true southerners. Sorry folks, if you don't know at least 2 full Hank Jr. songs, dont' know how to spell Lynnard Skynnard right, and were drinking sweet tea from you bottle as a toddler, you AIN'T southern. You also have to know how to make cornbread, grits, and use lard in your biscuits.


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## Joby Becker (Dec 13, 2009)

Adam Swilling said:


> Florida is only part of the south geographically. More northern or western transplants there than there are true southerners. Sorry folks, if you don't know at least 2 full Hank Jr. songs, *dont' know how to spell Lynnard Skynnard right*, and were drinking sweet tea from you bottle as a toddler,* you AIN'T southern*. You also have to know how to make cornbread, grits, and use lard in your biscuits.


Lynard Skynard is the band....wtf is *Lynnard Skynnard*? You obviously ain't southern by your own criteria...LOL


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## David Frost (Mar 29, 2006)

Joby Becker said:


> Lynard Skynard is the band....wtf is *Lynnard Skynnard*? You obviously ain't southern by your own criteria...LOL


Gimmee three steps mister and you'll never see me no more.

DFrost


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

That's what I was going to point out but Joby beat me to it! LOL. 

I hate cornbread and grits, that's some nasty shit and you folks in the south can keep it, I'll keep my enchilada's and Mexican food.  Oh and collar greens and chitlins and all that stuff too. The thing you have going for you is sweet tea, which is awesome and tea should never be missing sugar.


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## Keith Jenkins (Jun 6, 2007)

Joby Becker said:


> Lynard Skynard is the band....wtf is *Lynnard Skynnard*? You obviously ain't southern by your own criteria...LOL


Neither of you can spell.... it's Lynyrd Skynyrd.....


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## Adam Swilling (Feb 12, 2009)

Keith Jenkins said:


> Neither of you can spell.... it's Lynyrd Skynyrd.....


 LOL!! I'll count anything that's not "Leonard Skinard". Anyway, you get the point.I always like the Allmans better anyway. But I digress. On with the show.


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## Joby Becker (Dec 13, 2009)

Adam Swilling said:


> LOL!! I'll count anything that's not "Leonard Skinard". Anyway, you get the point.I always like the Allmans better anyway. But I digress. On with the show.


I could be wrong...LOL...google does have a lot of lynnard skynnard there too...maybe that IS the southern version...!!!

I love the Allman Bros....and Lynnard Skynnard too.


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## Adam Swilling (Feb 12, 2009)

Ashley Campbell said:


> That's what I was going to point out but Joby beat me to it! LOL.
> 
> I hate cornbread and grits, that's some nasty shit and you folks in the south can keep it, I'll keep my enchilada's and Mexican food.  Oh and collar greens and chitlins and all that stuff too. The thing you have going for you is sweet tea, which is awesome and tea should never be missing sugar.


 It's not "collar", it's collard.  I'll eat grits but I've got to load them with butter and sugar. I've never tried chitlins ( which is technically spelled chiterlings, believe it or not). Can't say that I have a desire to eat bowels.


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## Joby Becker (Dec 13, 2009)

Adam Swilling said:


> It's not "collar", it's collard.  I'll eat grits but I've got to load them with butter and sugar. I've never tried chitlins ( which is technically spelled chiterlings, believe it or not). Can't say that I have a desire to eat bowels.


SUGAR????? I think you meant Salt...LOL


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## maggie fraser (May 30, 2008)

Grits! I learned all about them from 'My Cousin Vinny' lol


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## Christopher Jones (Feb 17, 2009)

I think the South is the most interesting area of the US. Anyone here Cajun or Creole? Love your culture but couldnt eat your food, sorry.


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## maggie fraser (May 30, 2008)

Christopher Jones said:


> I think the South is the most interesting area of the US. Anyone here Cajun or Creole? Love your culture but couldnt eat your food, sorry.


Do Cajun or Creole have broadband ??


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## Richard Rutt (May 14, 2009)

Florida may not be a "Southern" State but this is Pretty funny![FONT=&quot]

A Florida senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. [/FONT][FONT=&quot] 
[/FONT][FONT=&quot] 
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Taking off down the road, he pushed it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-75, pushing the pedal even more. [/FONT][FONT=&quot] 
[/FONT][FONT=&quot] 
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a Florida State Trooper, blue lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. [/FONT][FONT=&quot] 
[/FONT][FONT=&quot] 
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this!" and pulled over to await the trooper's arrival. [/FONT][FONT=&quot] 
[/FONT][FONT=&quot] 
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]Pulling in behind him, the trooper got out of his vehicle and walked up to the Corvette. He looked at his watch, then said,[/FONT][FONT=&quot] 

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]"Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a new reason for speeding-- a reason I've never before heard--I'll let you go." [/FONT][FONT=&quot] 
[/FONT][FONT=&quot] 

[/FONT][FONT=&quot]The old gentleman paused then said: "Three years ago, my wife ran off with a Florida State Trooper. I thought you were bringing her back." [/FONT][FONT=&quot] 
[/FONT][FONT=&quot] 
[/FONT][FONT=&quot]"Have a good day, Sir," replied the trooper. [/FONT]


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## Christopher Jones (Feb 17, 2009)

maggie fraser said:


> Do Cajun or Creole have broadband ??


 Good point


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## Adam Swilling (Feb 12, 2009)

Joby Becker said:


> SUGAR????? I think you meant Salt...LOL


Nope, I meant sugar. Most people down here use salt. I eat 'em like a Yankee.


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## maggie fraser (May 30, 2008)

Adam Swilling said:


> Nope, I meant sugar. Most people down here use salt. I eat 'em like a Yankee.


 
Are you not a proper southerner then ? It sounds kind of like Scots porridge, only the soft folks eat it with sugar whereas everyone else eats it with salt and butter . Have you seen 'My Cousin Vinny' with Joe Pesci ?


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

Adam Swilling said:


> It's not "collar", it's collard.  I'll eat grits but I've got to load them with butter and sugar. I've never tried chitlins ( which is technically spelled chiterlings, believe it or not). Can't say that I have a desire to eat bowels.


See, my point exactly! I hear it pronounced like "collie" greens - I just know they taste awful, and as far as eating from the asshole forward on a pig, no thanks. I know what they smell like and I am not brave enough to eat anything that smells that repulsive when it's cooking. 
I spent one Thanksgiving with a family from Georgia - my taste buds were assaulted severely. Never again.

My family is from NY originally - we don't eat gross things. I will admit I do favor BBQ'ed ribs and fried chicken/catfish though.


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## Harry Keely (Aug 26, 2009)

I like some southern people better than northern folk, have live in NY,FL,SC,NC and god knows where next what does that make me, I also like hot black tea in the morning with sugar no milk and like sweet tea in the afternoon. I must be a east coast heinz 57 mutt than AHHHHHH HAHAHA. I do like NY and FL the best so far though.

Heres if you know your a Yankee or Southern Bell:
Yankee---use guys go **** yourselfs you shitheads
Southern---bless your heart 
*** Sorry couldn't help myself***


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

Harry Keely said:


> Heres if you know your a Yankee or Southern Bell:
> Yankee---use guys go **** yourselfs you shitheads
> Southern---bless your heart
> *** Sorry couldn't help myself***


That is scarily accurate...
I gotta say, "bless your heart" vs "eat shit and die" = I think we all know which I use on a more frequent basis. I don't think you will ever hear the word "y'all" come out of my mouth either.


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## Joby Becker (Dec 13, 2009)

Harry Keely said:


> I like some southern people better than northern folk, have live in NY,FL,SC,NC and god knows where next what does that make me, I also like hot black tea in the morning with sugar no milk and like sweet tea in the afternoon. I must be a east coast heinz 57 mutt than AHHHHHH HAHAHA. I do like NY and FL the best so far though.
> 
> Heres if you know your a Yankee or Southern Bell:
> Yankee---use guys go **** yourselfs you shitheads
> ...


or fu-- off, or jagoff...
Most of my best friends FLIP me off when they see me...and vice versa...
that didn't go over to good in Indiana, fine in IL though.....


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## Christopher Jones (Feb 17, 2009)

Joby Becker said:


> or fu-- off, or jagoff...
> Most of my best friends FLIP me off when they see me...and vice versa...
> that didn't go over to good in Indiana, fine in IL though.....


Haha, thats very much Aussie like as well. The national pastime here is "Taking the piss" out of your mates. 90% our guy talk is paying out on each other. I could see other people from other places taking offence at a friend constantly asking him to say Hi to his wife for him, and asking him the next time he sees his mother can he tell her she left her g-sting at his place.


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## Harry Keely (Aug 26, 2009)

Joby Becker said:


> or fu-- off, or jagoff...
> Most of my best friends FLIP me off when they see me...and vice versa...
> that didn't go over to good in Indiana, fine in IL though.....


Well at work I have the problem with my middle finger at times, people say that my middle finger has a mind of its own, My sons godparents are in indy they would of return the favor, although at OG indy club been there twice and have been told to be on my best behavior:-k. Like chicago and milwaukee though everyone there that I did meet had my mind set, pretty scary8)


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## Joby Becker (Dec 13, 2009)

Harry Keely said:


> Well at work I have the problem with my middle finger at times, people say that my middle finger has a mind of its own, My sons godparents are in indy they would of return the favor, although at OG indy club been there twice and have been told to be on my best behavior:-k. Like chicago and milwaukee though everyone there that I did meet had my mind set, pretty scary8)


Milwaukee is nuckin futs... Every time I go up there, I can't even walk my dog around the block without several cars full of people yelling obscenities at me, at various intervals..not in a friendly way either..just walking LOL...one guy threw firecrackers at my dog, even gas stations arent immune... a lot of drunk people up there I think....and these are random strangers..not friends....usually adults too, not kids..weird..

when I lived in IN, me and my roomie, both from Chicago, set a trend by greeting our friends with the finger...LOL.


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## Harry Keely (Aug 26, 2009)

Joby Becker said:


> Milwaukee is nuckin futs... Every time I go up there, I can't even walk my dog around the block without several cars full of people yelling obscenities at me, at various intervals..not in a friendly way either..just walking LOL...one guy threw firecrackers at my dog, even gas stations arent immune... a lot of drunk people up there I think....and these are random strangers..not friends....usually adults too, not kids..weird..
> 
> when I lived in IN, me and my roomie, both from Chicago, set a trend by greeting our friends with the finger...LOL.


Thats funny we were down by the water at the sea wall with our four year old son and had one of thos experiences, I guess its common.


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## Jim Nash (Mar 30, 2006)

Harry Keely said:


> I like some southern people better than northern folk, have live in NY,FL,SC,NC and god knows where next what does that make me, I also like hot black tea in the morning with sugar no milk and like sweet tea in the afternoon. I must be a east coast heinz 57 mutt than AHHHHHH HAHAHA. I do like NY and FL the best so far though.
> 
> Heres if you know your a Yankee or Southern Bell:
> Yankee---use guys go **** yourselfs you shitheads
> ...



That's funny . I was educated by some southern K9 guys on proper edicate on how to use the term " Bless your heart ." 

Only in the south can insulting someone sound polite .

It must be the" Minnesota nice " in me but I have trouble with the directness of the eastcoasters (New York , New Jersey mostly) . After a few pops I have trouble not punching them sometimes . Sober I'm fine . Nice folks just different ways of communicating .


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## Adam Swilling (Feb 12, 2009)

Did you know that in the south, SHITLOAD is an actual form of measurement?


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## Mo Earle (Mar 1, 2008)

_"Did you know that in the south, SHITLOAD is an actual form of measurement?"

_sure enough is!!


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## David Frost (Mar 29, 2006)

My assistant dog trainer is from NJ. Years ago, when we were both working the road, and he was fresh from NJ where he had been a cop in Camden NJ. We were at a Wendys having lunch. An older guy walked up to the table and asked the quickest way to OpryLand. My partner looked up at him and said: "hey, we're eatin' here, I wouldn't come to you and interupt your lunch. I looked at my partner like he has just lost his mind, jumped up from the table and said; Sir, let's walk outside and I'll show the the way to turn and which road to take. When I got back to the table, he just looked at me and said; "what?" We had a couple more incidents in the early years, the funniest I think is when he leaned out the window and a driver that had stopped entirely too long at a STOP sign and he said; " The sign say stop, not give the f*** up."
American by birth, Southern by the Grace of God. ha ha.

DFrost


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## David Frost (Mar 29, 2006)

Adam Swilling said:


> Did you know that in the south, SHITLOAD is an actual form of measurement?


Along with; tote sack full, passel, whole lotta and near enough.

DFrost


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## Jim Nash (Mar 30, 2006)

David Frost said:


> My assistant dog trainer is from NJ. Years ago, when we were both working the road, and he was fresh from NJ where he had been a cop in Camden NJ. We were at a Wendys having lunch. An older guy walked up to the table and asked the quickest way to OpryLand. My partner looked up at him and said: "hey, we're eatin' here, I wouldn't come to you and interupt your lunch. I looked at my partner like he has just lost his mind, jumped up from the table and said; Sir, let's walk outside and I'll show the the way to turn and which road to take. When I got back to the table, he just looked at me and said; "what?" We had a couple more incidents in the early years, the funniest I think is when he leaned out the window and a driver that had stopped entirely too long at a STOP sign and he said; " The sign say stop, not give the f*** up."
> American by birth, Southern by the Grace of God. ha ha.
> 
> DFrost



Got to admit it , that stuff is funny . Trained with a bunch of New Jersey guys at Blackwater years ago and they said stuff like that . Initially it was tough getting use to but after awhile I coudn't help but laugh my ass off . We had a great time . They were funny f***ers , bless their hearts .


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## Harry Keely (Aug 26, 2009)

Jim Nash said:


> That's funny . I was educated by some southern K9 guys on proper edicate on how to use the term " Bless your heart ."
> 
> Only in the south can insulting someone sound polite .
> 
> It must be the" Minnesota nice " in me but I have trouble with the directness of the eastcoasters (New York , New Jersey mostly) . After a few pops I have trouble not punching them sometimes . Sober I'm fine . Nice folks just different ways of communicating .


Jim when I first came to SC where we have been now for about 5-6 years the other southern locations where briefer in between NY living a couple of the K9 guys, FF,Medics tried to get me go cow tipping, snipe hunting I didn't fall for either and told them go **** themselves, they all kinda paused for a minute and where taken off there feet. I said what the **** is wrong with ya your trying to **** me and when I tell you to go **** yourselves you look at me as the wierd one. When we were walking back I was told in the south we dont say that we say bless your heart.

So still to this day if I here that good old southern saying said to me I reply with I know what that means and you too can go **** yourself LOL. I'm not shy at all and am very blunt but hey the truth is always better head on than a knife in the back right.


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## Harry Keely (Aug 26, 2009)

David Frost said:


> My assistant dog trainer is from NJ. Years ago, when we were both working the road, and he was fresh from NJ where he had been a cop in Camden NJ. We were at a Wendys having lunch. An older guy walked up to the table and asked the quickest way to OpryLand. My partner looked up at him and said: "hey, we're eatin' here, I wouldn't come to you and interupt your lunch. I looked at my partner like he has just lost his mind, jumped up from the table and said; Sir, let's walk outside and I'll show the the way to turn and which road to take. When I got back to the table, he just looked at me and said; "what?" We had a couple more incidents in the early years, the funniest I think is when he leaned out the window and a driver that had stopped entirely too long at a STOP sign and he said; " The sign say stop, not give the f*** up."
> American by birth, Southern by the Grace of God. ha ha.
> 
> DFrost


Yup no a few like that, family is still active in NYC or retired from it and also myself am very blunt. Also have a friend from Newark PD and also another friend from Broward County FL here that are on the job and yup years later still operate that way depending on if its the west side or east side of the county. Luckly there is a good bit of northern transplants and floridians in the dept. Good place to work for and known for a dept. to take care of their own and handle business. Also one of the few strong K9 programs in the state too. Grace of God is in all of us its just how some choose to embrace and use it LOL.


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

Jim Nash said:


> That's funny . I was educated by some southern K9 guys on proper edicate on how to use the term " Bless your heart ."
> 
> Only in the south can insulting someone sound polite .
> 
> It must be the" Minnesota nice " in me but I have trouble with the directness of the eastcoasters (New York , New Jersey mostly) . After a few pops I have trouble not punching them sometimes . Sober I'm fine . Nice folks just different ways of communicating .


LOL, you said "pops". I've never heard liquor/beer referred to as pop. I thought that was soda.  I don't know, in my world, everything is coke until defined by brand name.

My grandmother is from Tennessee, and she always looks rather shocked hearing the "f" word and calls us a "bunch of damn Yankees with no class" for using it,


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## Gerry Grimwood (Apr 2, 2007)

Ashley Campbell said:


> LOL, you said "pops". I've never heard liquor/beer referred to as pop. I thought that was soda.


You've never heard the term ..wobbly pop ??


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

Never Gerry. Lager, beer, or named specifically yes, but never "pop" - to me pop is the same thing as soda or coke.


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## Jim Nash (Mar 30, 2006)

Harry Keely said:


> Jim when I first came to SC where we have been now for about 5-6 years the other southern locations where briefer in between NY living a couple of the K9 guys, FF,Medics tried to get me go cow tipping, snipe hunting I didn't fall for either and told them go **** themselves, they all kinda paused for a minute and where taken off there feet. I said what the **** is wrong with ya your trying to **** me and when I tell you to go **** yourselves you look at me as the wierd one. When we were walking back I was told in the south we dont say that we say bless your heart.
> 
> So still to this day if I here that good old southern saying said to me I reply with I know what that means and you too can go **** yourself LOL. I'm not shy at all and am very blunt but hey the truth is always better head on than a knife in the back right.



Either way east , west , north , south if you learn the language of the area it's all pretty evident what they are trying to convey . Just different ways of getting there . It just gets real funny at times communicating while in the learning phase .


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## Jim Nash (Mar 30, 2006)

Ashley Campbell said:


> LOL, you said "pops". I've never heard liquor/beer referred to as pop. I thought that was soda.  I don't know, in my world, everything is coke until defined by brand name.
> 
> My grandmother is from Tennessee, and she always looks rather shocked hearing the "f" word and calls us a "bunch of damn Yankees with no class" for using it,


What makes you think I was talking about liquor ? We were having "pops" . That's my story and I'm sticking to it .


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

Well I'll be damned if drinking coke will make you want to hit someone or not be sober


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## Jim Nash (Mar 30, 2006)

Ashley Campbell said:


> Well I'll be damned if drinking coke will make you want to hit someone or not be sober



Nah , that stuff just keeps me awake and makes me burp .


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

How attractive.  ******* mating call? I thought you were from the north!


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## Jim Nash (Mar 30, 2006)

Ashley Campbell said:


> How attractive.  ******* mating call? I thought you were from the north!


Up here I'm known as an "Eastsider" because I grew up in a well known part of St Paul . I'm one of the few Eastsiders to still have all of my teeth .


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## Nancy Jocoy (Apr 19, 2006)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PL-1T9g5-vU

Damn makes me want to secede from the union!

And I like grits and okra and cornbread without sugar in it and homemade vegetable soup, blackberries, dewberries and collard greens  

My roots run deep deep deep in the south (late 1600s) even though I am politically more left wing than probably 95% of the foks on this forum.

.....not a rebel (though my great great grandfather lost his leg at the battle of kennesaw and the women and children hid in the cemetery) but......now you just hit a nerve there.......makes me make you cut a switch and give you all a good whippin and stuff your mouth with horse hockey.


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

Nancy Jocoy said:


> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PL-1T9g5-vU
> 
> Damn makes me want to secede from the union!
> 
> ...


In response to half of your post in which I have no idea of what you're talking about.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_mDTLphIVY

 - sorry, couldn't resist. No clue what a "dewberry" is but it sounds like something I wouldn't want to eat.


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## Gerry Grimwood (Apr 2, 2007)

Nancy Jocoy said:


> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PL-1T9g5-vU


Not too many songs out there that'll make me dance once I got my Spiderman pj's on and my dewberries are all wet an shit. 8-[


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## Nancy Jocoy (Apr 19, 2006)

LOL a Dewberry is Kind of like a blackberry only it grows lower.....

I was in tears when I was in college waiting tables and a New Jersey customer asked me for a dahgeiniggen. Every time I tried to get him to clarify what he wanted he just hollered it louder and louder and louder.

sigh......our HOA president is from New Jersey .....little italian SOB with a Napolean complex......don't get me going now on New Jersey. 

Gerry I think you are confusing DINGLE berries with DEW berries


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## Harry Keely (Aug 26, 2009)

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHA I'm married to a Jersey girl and love every square inch of her northern bitch attitude hench one of the biggest things that turned me on to marry her ass:lol:. I'm 1/2 and 1/2 nasty attitude ( Italy ) and Drunk ( Irish ). My wedding party consisted of all Jersy girls alot of them pure italy heritage and my side pure NYC with a few islanders that was pretty much pure Italy or Ireland heritage. Best and most honest people in the world I have come across and I been around this nation and cross seas:wink:.

Its alright though Nancy your still alright in my book, I just make sure you and my wife never cross paths


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## Jim Nash (Mar 30, 2006)

Harry Keely said:


> AHHHHHHHHHHHHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHA I'm married to a Jersey girl and love every square inch of her northern bitch attitude hench one of the biggest things that turned me on to marry her ass:lol:. I'm 1/2 and 1/2 nasty attitude ( Italy ) and Drunk ( Irish ). My wedding party consisted of all Jersy girls alot of them pure italy heritage and my side pure NYC with a few islanders that was pretty much pure Italy or Ireland heritage. Best and most honest people in the world I have come across and I been around this nation and cross seas:wink:.
> 
> Its alright though Nancy your still alright in my book, I just make sure you and my wife never cross paths



An Italian/Jersey girl . Let me guess she's orange .


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## Harry Keely (Aug 26, 2009)

Jim Nash said:


> An Italian/Jersey girl . Let me guess she's orange .


Nope not as guido as Snooki from that jersey shore show, no fake baking actually


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## Bob Scott (Mar 30, 2006)

Love the Southern folks. South East in particular. Manners and respect like nowhere else on the planet.

North East :-o 
I got lost on the Pennsylvania turnpike and stopped in a quick mart of sorts. I asked the gal behind the counter for directions mentioning that I was lost. Her comment was "maybe you should have stayed home". 

You can still start an argument in Missouri, depending on where your at in the State, over being Northern or Southern.


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## Nancy Jocoy (Apr 19, 2006)

Hey its all good fun.

Gotta go train dogs all day and maybe get ready for snow coming our way. YOu know prolly have to go out and buy 20 loaves of bread and 50 gallons of milk so if we loose power alla the milk can go bad.

They move down here, run us down, bring their damn snow and make fun of us for not being able to drive in it but give them a little hurricane and they all get unglued.


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## David Frost (Mar 29, 2006)

Cathead biscuits, country ham, redeye gravy. Sure, Yan --- uhh people of the northern persuasion make fun of that then eat something called hash. uh huh --- bless their hearts.

DFrost


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

Nancy Jocoy said:


> I was in tears when I was in college waiting tables and a New Jersey customer asked me for a dahgeiniggen. Every time I tried to get him to clarify what he wanted he just hollered it louder and louder and louder.


Alright, so I'll give you guys a whack at my naivety just because my friend from GA won't let me live it down.
At the Thanksgiving dinner where my so-called unrefined tastes were assaulted with such repulsive items as collarD greens, my friend and her husband completely took advantage of the fact that my family is from the north. They were talking about grits. Since I didn't know what grits were, I got rused big time when she starts explaining jobs in the south, naming one as "picking grits". 
I didn't know the damned things are made out of ground corn (which should be reserved for livestock food if you ask me) but she goes on and on about how picking grits was a good job in high school and all this. Then her husband starts laughing hysterically and explains that grits aren't a type of plant. 

Of course, to fill northern fashion, I told them they could both go **** themselves.


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## Maren Bell Jones (Jun 7, 2006)

I was raised in the South (Northern Virginia and Georgia) and we always said "bless your/their heart" in a nicer sort of way, not so much the mean way. I remember moving up from Georgia to Colorado in middle school and stopping at a diner for lunch in Kansas. I ordered tea and thought there was something wrong with it! The waitress (bless her heart) was confused since there was obviously sugar on the table to use. :mrgreen: Used to call everything Coke too. I hate how the Omaha and Kansas City people who call it pop. I'll settle for the St. Louis "soda" nowadays that I've been in Missouri so long. Missouri was technically a Southern state, but I will NOT call it "Missour-ah!" [-([-([-(


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## Adam Swilling (Feb 12, 2009)

In the part of TN I'm in, every soft drink is referred to as Coke. When you stop to get something to drink, the conversation goes something like this:
" I'm stopping to get cokes. What kind does eveyone want?"
" I'll take a Mountain Dew."
"I'll take a Diet Pepsi."


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## Harry Keely (Aug 26, 2009)

Ashley Campbell said:


> Alright, so I'll give you guys a whack at my naivety just because my friend from GA won't let me live it down.
> At the Thanksgiving dinner where my so-called unrefined tastes were assaulted with such repulsive items as collarD greens, my friend and her husband completely took advantage of the fact that my family is from the north. They were talking about grits. Since I didn't know what grits were, I got rused big time when she starts explaining jobs in the south, naming one as "picking grits".
> I didn't know the damned things are made out of ground corn (which should be reserved for livestock food if you ask me) but she goes on and on about how picking grits was a good job in high school and all this. Then her husband starts laughing hysterically and explains that grits aren't a type of plant.
> 
> Of course, to fill northern fashion, I told them they could both go **** themselves.


Northen Italian thanksgiving consist of no turkey or ham sometimes and nothing but a full spread of very very tasty italian food, pastries,breads ahhhhh man I miss it I need to go visit my aunt in Brooklyn, my mouth is watering just think about it:sad:


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## will fernandez (May 17, 2006)

I spent the first 30 years of my life growing up in lower manhattan. It was right on the border between chinatown and little italy. I grew up in a virtual melitng pot with people of every color, race and religion. When I moved to Savannah (though my wife warned me) I was taken back by the racial tension. The one thing I miss about the north is the bluntness, at least you knew where you stood. Here in the south, people are very polite but they will slit your throat when your not looking.

I still cant believe it everytime my kids speak to me with their southern twangs. Almost shocks me as much when my neighbor of chinese decent talks to me in the most southern accent of all time. God bless America.


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## Jim Nash (Mar 30, 2006)

David Frost said:


> Cathead biscuits, country ham, redeye gravy. Sure, Yan --- uhh people of the northern persuasion make fun of that then eat something called hash. uh huh --- bless their hearts.
> 
> DFrost


Hash is gourmet cuisine compared to some of the stuff the Scandinavians cook up here in Minnesota . My dad was Irish and My mom is Norwegian . We had a lot of interesting things cooking in my house as a kid . From my dad's Corn beef and cabbage to all of the assorted awesome hotdishes my mom made . But the most interesting is Lutefisk with rutabagas . Cod and lye . Yum . :---)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lutefisk


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## Bob Scott (Mar 30, 2006)

A fairy tale told by a Northerner starts out
"Once upon a time"

A fairy tail told by a Southerner starts out
"Ya'll ain't gonna believe this shit"


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## Terry Devine (Mar 11, 2008)

Yankee = someone who comes down from up north, spends about a week and then goes back.

Damn Yankee = someone who comes down from up north and stays!

Gosh Damn Yankee = someone who comes down from up north, stays and marries a southern girl !!!!!!!!

I was born and raised in Brooklyn, ended up marrying a Tallahassee Lassie.

Just love them 
G = girls
R = raised
I = in
T = the
S = south


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## Bob Scott (Mar 30, 2006)

Jim Nash said:


> Hash is gourmet cuisine compared to some of the stuff the Scandinavians cook up here in Minnesota . My dad was Irish and My mom is Norwegian . We had a lot of interesting things cooking in my house as a kid . From my dad's Corn beef and cabbage to all of the assorted awesome hotdishes my mom made . But the most interesting is Lutefisk with rutabagas . Cod and lye . Yum . :---)
> 
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lutefisk



My granpa (from Ireland) said corned beef and cabbage is an American invention but the family always had it on St. Pat day here.
He said if an Irishman had beef he probably stole it from the land lord. Meat, when available, was pork or lamb.
As my sweet old Irish grandma would say when asked what's for supper?
"Pigs arse and cabbage and you'll do well to keep your hands off my soup bone". 
The lovely lady died 9-10 yrs before I was born so it's only through stories. 
Grandpa is well imprinted in my head. Both in story and that damn cane of his.

The fiddle, the music, the dance, much of Southern and Appilachian hill culture goes back to Irish and Scots immigration......not to mention booze and fighting spirit! :-o;-)


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## Jim Nash (Mar 30, 2006)

Bob Scott said:


> My granpa (from Ireland) said corned beef and cabbage is an American invention but the family always had it on St. Pat day here.
> He said if an Irishman had beef he probably stole it from the land lord. Meat, when available, was pork or lamb.
> As my sweet old Irish grandma would say when asked what's for supper?
> "Pigs arse and cabbage and you'll do well to keep your hands off my soup bone".
> ...



I'm sure that's true . My dad was a good cook and cooked it often . He also was a good Irish singer too . I remember him singing to us often . I also remember as a kid him and his brothers drinking and fighting . Weddings were always interesting . Especially ones with my dads loud drunking family and the quiet reserved family members on my mom's side . They always had that look like they were just barely tolerating my dad's side and just wished they would STFU . 

I think the it's a similar type situation with the Norwegians here with the cooking of lutefisk . I'm not so sure most really like it that much (though my mom says she loves it) but it's more about holding on to their culture and pride in being from Norway .

My mom's family is very proud of their heritage . The way I understand it my grandfather and others came here with the last name of Wilson but changed it to Skrukrud (yes screw crude) because it sounded more Norwegian . Little did he know what that meant here . I think it means something like " beautiful fjord " in his language . My poor mom .


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## Bob Scott (Mar 30, 2006)

I know a lot of names were changed at Ellis Island because those doing interviews often wrote what "they" though was the correct spelling but to intentionally change you own name from Wilson to Skurud........DAMN! :lol: 
I do understand about the brothers fighting. Dad was one of ten boys (six girls) and I saw more fights at family funerals and weddings then a body should be allowed. :lol: :lol:


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## Jim Nash (Mar 30, 2006)

Bob Scott said:


> I know a lot of names were changed at Ellis Island because those doing interviews often wrote what "they" though was the correct spelling but to intentionally change you own name from Wilson to Skurud........DAMN! :lol:
> I do understand about the brothers fighting. Dad was one of ten boys (six girls) and I saw more fights at family funerals and weddings then a body should be allowed. :lol: :lol:


Holy crap ! That must be an Irish Catholic family for sure . My dad's too but he was ony 1 of 5 brothers and 3 sisters . Mom has a collection of some of the old newspaper articles about them from the 40's and 50' . Mostly it's about drinking and fighting and done it that dramatic style reporters had back then . They did call my mom (not by name but it was her) a "gun moll" . That was an article from Wisconsin where a bunch of good old Irish St Paul boys went over there and beat up a bunch of locals . My poor mom .

Don't forget the birthday parties . I saw my Aunt Mary break my Uncle Mort's nose with a lawn chair at my dad's 50th birthday . My dad and his older brother got into fights at everything . If it wasn't with each other it was sticking up for each other .


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## David Frost (Mar 29, 2006)

Bob Scott said:


> I know a lot of names were changed at Ellis Island because those doing interviews often wrote what "they" though was the correct spelling but to intentionally change you own name from Wilson to Skurud........DAMN! :lol:
> I do understand about the brothers fighting. Dad was one of ten boys (six girls) and I saw more fights at family funerals and weddings then a body should be allowed. :lol: :lol:




My wife does geneology and she certainly agrees with that. Names were often changed for ease of spelling or pronouniation or because they were misunderstood. 

DFrost


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## Harry Keely (Aug 26, 2009)

Terry Devine said:


> Yankee = someone who comes down from up north, spends about a week and then goes back.
> 
> Damn Yankee = someone who comes down from up north and stays!
> 
> ...


I have been told that but was told buy a FF Chief down here that theres one more the worst of all.

****ing S.O.B. Damn Yankee this is the one that comes to the south, stays, marries and knocks your daughter up.

I'm just a Damn Yankee, My woman brought me here :lol:


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## Harry Keely (Aug 26, 2009)

Bob Scott said:


> I know a lot of names were changed at Ellis Island because those doing interviews often wrote what "they" though was the correct spelling but to intentionally change you own name from Wilson to Skurud........DAMN! :lol:
> I do understand about the brothers fighting. Dad was one of ten boys (six girls) and I saw more fights at family funerals and weddings then a body should be allowed. :lol: :lol:


Hell thats the only time I ever see my home family together which is one somebody drops dead or somebody gets murder --- I mean married :-D:-D:-D

Its funny though my fathers side being Irsih gets stupid crazy drunk during funeral and wakes. My mothers side is Italian and very reserved and not much loudness but the food is killer.


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## Nancy Jocoy (Apr 19, 2006)

Got a cousin who is in prison for life somewhere - he was a hit man for the Dixie Mafia. Guess its that rogue Scot-Irish blood....


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## Cayla Morrow (Sep 5, 2010)

David Frost said:


> American by birth, Southern by the Grace of God. ha ha.
> 
> DFrost


AMEN!!!! Born and raised in Texas. Havent been out of the south since I was, like, 3 years old. Love grits. But half of my family are Chicago Italians so family gatherings are interesting. I would never live anywhere but in the south


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## David Frost (Mar 29, 2006)

Kayla Morro said:


> AMEN!!!! Born and raised in Texas. Havent been out of the south since I was, like, 3 years old. Love grits. But half of my family are Chicago Italians so family gatherings are interesting. I would never live anywhere but in the south


My oldest son (a Native Texan) runs a golf course here in TN. He can only take his annual vacation during the winter months. He is in Texas now. He returns every year, spends time with friends, hunts hogs and visits relatives. He makes it back to Texas much more than I do. I miss the Lone Star State. My wife however, is from NM. She never cared all that much for Texas. 

DFrost


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## Bob Scott (Mar 30, 2006)

David Frost said:


> My wife does geneology and she certainly agrees with that. Names were often changed for ease of spelling or pronouniation or because they were misunderstood.
> 
> DFrost


I an old cemetery across the river my FIL's family can be found under 3-4 different spellings.
I found a ton of info on ancestry.com. Mormon site I think.
It got really confusing for a while because my grandad and grandma were Charles and Elizabeth as were his parents Charles and Elizabeth. Both Grand parents and great grandparents had a shitl load of kids. Both generations had Michaels, Michael, Thomas, Francis, Jack, Charles, Elizabeth, Dorthy, yadda, yadda yadda. 
An older cousin in her 80s, still living finally opened up on what she learned over the yrs. No wonder everyone was so vague about answering questions.
One of my dad's brothers (born 1905) was a alderman, then a lawyer then a circuit court judge. Seems he covered up a ton of crap. And I always thought I was royalty. :-\"O
I should be grateful for uncle Mike. He saved my ass a few times in my younger days but there were times I wished they lost me in a dark hole somewhere. Payback to him reeeeealy sucked.:lol::lol::lol:


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## Jim Nash (Mar 30, 2006)

Bob Scott said:


> I an old cemetery across the river my FIL's family can be found under 3-4 different spellings.
> I found a ton of info on ancestry.com. Mormon site I think.
> It got really confusing for a while because my grandad and grandma were Charles and Elizabeth as were his parents Charles and Elizabeth. Both Grand parents and great grandparents had a shitl load of kids. Both generations had Michaels, Michael, Thomas, Francis, Jack, Charles, Elizabeth, Dorthy, yadda, yadda yadda.
> An older cousin in her 80s, still living finally opened up on what she learned over the yrs. No wonder everyone was so vague about answering questions.
> ...



With the Irish in your family there must have been plenty of Marys also . Buy the way why are so many women's middle name Marie ?


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## Bob Scott (Mar 30, 2006)

Jim Nash said:


> With the Irish in your family there must have been plenty of Marys also . Buy the way why are so many women's middle name Marie ?


One Mary Bernese in there but most of the brothers were Joseph by their second name. Michael Joseph, James Joseph, Leo Joseph, Francis Joseph and a few more.
Grandma's middle name was Anistasia so most of the girls had that for their second. That's a name I always liked but I don't recall it being passed down. Course I coulda missed it somewhere. When Granpa died in 1957 he had 62 grandkids and great grandkids. I was 12 at the time.
Both sides of my wife's family, Spanish and Romanian, have some really nice yearly family reunions we attend. The Scotts only tried that once. I don't think we're allowed in Overland Missouri anymore. :lol::lol::twisted:


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

LOL Bob. Family reunions...
The last one I went to I will never forget. My grandmother and I had visited the family cemetery before we made it to the reunion - held in Nashville, TN. Her side of the family is from the South, aka "wouldn't say shit if they had a mouthful of it". 
So her older cousin had a headstone put in the family cemetery, between my grandmothers parents. She's got some balls, let me tell you. The whole thing was pretty tense, and me being the rude one, said something  I made a comment during the big family dinner that it takes a lot of balls to put your headstone between someone elses parents. 
Awesome! Whole table goes quiet, shock and awe. Then the cousin speaks up (I don't know family relation but she's not that close to me, got to be 2nd or 3rd cousin or further, she's like 90 years old now) and I'm getting this look from my grandma that says "shut the **** up". So I ignore that and press the issue a bit. The cousin finally says "well I'm going to be cremated anyway, what would you do with my ashes?"

Bless my grandmother for interjecting at that moment before something to the effect of "I'd flush them down the shitter" came out of my mouth - in such a gentile way, she puts out her hand and makes a blowing sound, like you'd blow dust off of something.

Have I mentioned I'm not welcome back yet?  That reunion was 10 years ago. When that old bat dies, I'm bringing a shovel to the funeral.


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## Bob Scott (Mar 30, 2006)

Ashley Campbell said:


> LOL Bob. Family reunions...
> The last one I went to I will never forget. My grandmother and I had visited the family cemetery before we made it to the reunion - held in Nashville, TN. Her side of the family is from the South, aka "wouldn't say shit if they had a mouthful of it".
> So her older cousin had a headstone put in the family cemetery, between my grandmothers parents. She's got some balls, let me tell you. The whole thing was pretty tense, and me being the rude one, said something  I made a comment during the big family dinner that it takes a lot of balls to put your headstone between someone elses parents.
> Awesome! Whole table goes quiet, shock and awe. Then the cousin speaks up (I don't know family relation but she's not that close to me, got to be 2nd or 3rd cousin or further, she's like 90 years old now) and I'm getting this look from my grandma that says "shut the **** up". So I ignore that and press the issue a bit. The cousin finally says "well I'm going to be cremated anyway, what would you do with my ashes?"
> ...



Do cousins in Tenn actually get far enough out to be considered 2nd and 3rd? I always though things were lots closer. Kinda like 1st cousin = uncle Billy = sister Betty Jean's daddy = ..........:-k :grin::wink:

Some of my mom's folks going back were for real, hillbillies. Old family pictures are a bit scarry. The women had maden names along with married names on the backs of the pics. Boyer/Smith for example. There were a few Boyer/Boyer.  Go figure!
Grandpa Weirschem (German) had a piece of his nose bitten off in a fight as did great uncle Edgar's (French Canadian) ear. 
Damn miracle I turned out so dern sweet and cuddly! :grin::grin:


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## Cayla Morrow (Sep 5, 2010)

David Frost said:


> My oldest son (a Native Texan) runs a golf course here in TN. He can only take his annual vacation during the winter months. He is in Texas now. He returns every year, spends time with friends, hunts hogs and visits relatives. He makes it back to Texas much more than I do. I miss the Lone Star State. My wife however, is from NM. She never cared all that much for Texas.
> 
> DFrost


 
Well he is definately welcome to come hunt hogs at any time!! I'm lucky that there aren't many where I live, we just have coyotes and deer. But some of my friends in north texas will pay you to come kill hogs on their ranch. There are way too many.


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

Bob Scott said:


> Do cousins in Tenn actually get far enough out to be considered 2nd and 3rd? I always though things were lots closer. Kinda like 1st cousin = uncle Billy = sister Betty Jean's daddy = ..........:-k :grin::wink:


I don't know, they're not originally from TN though - most are from northern Texas/Oklahoma. 
Personally, I just call them by their first names and don't worry about how they are related. They are all my grandmothers cousins, so as far as I'm concerned they aren't that closely related to me. I mean really, like one of them is my grandmothers first cousins granddaughter - we're about as close to being blood as you and I are Bob, lol.


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## Bob Scott (Mar 30, 2006)

Aren't we all brothers and sisters?! 
KUMBIYAAAAAAAAA! KUMBIYAAAAA! \\/:lol::wink:


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

Bob Scott said:


> Aren't we all brothers and sisters?!
> KUMBIYAAAAAAAAA! KUMBIYAAAAA! \\/:lol::wink:


No. We'll have none of that "I'm my own grandpa" stuff going on. My ex's family is nearly that bad. His aunt is also his sister in law, his uncle is his brother, and his nephew is his cousin. 
^ 100% serious. I think he married me as an "outcross" lol.
They're not even from the south either, they're from Vermont.


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## David Frost (Mar 29, 2006)

Ashley Campbell said:


>


During the '96 Olympics, I was working a bomb dog at the Ocoee White Water venue. After our sweeps our "post" was the dam that controlled the water for the kayaking event. It is in a very rural area of the state. So rural, that the only resturant in town was a small meat and three. We had one black Trooper in our unit. While eating at this resturant, a guy walked up to the table, bib overalls, no shirt, one strap undone, brogans and maybe 5 teeth. He stopped in front of me, I was sitting on the end, the black Trooper next to me. The guy looked at me and said: "where'd ya'll get the alien". I swear I heard banjo music when he said that. I just looked at him and said; Sir, we just came in here to eat, maybe you need to do the same thing. He said; "well, alright then". Walked back to his table and didn't say or do anything else. That poster just reminded me of that incident. 

DFrost


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## Ashley Campbell (Jun 21, 2009)

What are brogans and a meat and three?


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## Nancy Jocoy (Apr 19, 2006)

Little hole in the wall restaurants - most I saw were like mini cafeterieas with steam table - you get a meat and three sides (and, of course cornbread and sweet tea) for your meal - you walk down the line and pick out what you want.

Brogans - kind of shoe/boot isnt it?

Used to HATE to take my uncle fishing. He knew the best places but I always had to wash the brown stripe off the side of the car. My grandmother had class, now, she kept her spit can to her self but my uncle and his family kept a Hi-C can in the middle of the living room floor which they could all hit dead on.


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## Bob Scott (Mar 30, 2006)

Nancy Jocoy said:


> Little hole in the wall restaurants - most I saw were like mini cafeterieas with steam table - you get a meat and three sides (and, of course cornbread and sweet tea) for your meal - you walk down the line and pick out what you want.
> 
> Brogans - kind of shoe/boot isnt it?
> 
> Used to HATE to take my uncle fishing. He knew the best places but I always had to wash the brown stripe off the side of the car. My grandmother had class, now, she kept her spit can to her self but my uncle and his family kept a Hi-C can in the middle of the living room floor which they could all hit dead on.



Granpa Scott wasn't country, just Irish:-o. He just laid the daily news on the floor. Didn't need no stinking can! :-&
Aunt Jenny took care of him and two bachelor brothers. Poor woman was daft as they come!


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